eco.logic.soul

Author Archive

I am happy, yet sad. Joyous, yet angry. Hopeful, yet in despair. The world has shown me how amazing life, nature, people can be and I have experienced the awesomeness of the earth and her power and beauty. On the other hand, I see how utterly destructive humanity is and I can’t help but wonder how these two realities can co-exist at the same time. They are truly like parallel realities that I am sometimes able to walk between. I am deeply torn by my own sense of what is going on in the world today and how any type of meaningful change is possible. I talk to others who equally feel that there is something wrong with the world. There is definitely a commonness to what we see is wrong – the main difference is in how we look at changing things.

I see separation vs community as what fundamentally sets apart the viewpoints. It seems as if the dichotomy of human existence at this moment in history is between the old belief system that we are separate from each other and nature which isolates us – a very fearful place to be – when in fact we are inextricably connected in the web of life through the relationships we have with friends, family, communities – locally, regionally, nationally, globally – and even extending into our relationship with nature – plants, animals, mother earth, the solar system, galaxy, universe.

The idea that we are separate causes us to feel afraid of everything outside of ourselves, though usually will allow for safety and identity to include the circle of family and close friends. It is difficult to truly understand the idea that we are interconnected with other people and nature. Even talking about it in this way, I am making a distinction between humans and the natural world, yet even though we are very much a part of the natural world, we still tend to think of ourselves as separate from, outside of that category.

Yet even in this sense of isolation and separation that is pervasive in our way of relating to the world, there is a longing for community, a desire to connect back in to our true nature and experience the fullness of life that we are seeking and is unable to be fullfilled in isolation. The Oneness, Spirit, God, the Divine, Love, Pure Consciousness -whatever one calls it – it is here an we sense it. This is our hope. This is what calls to our souls and reminds us that we do not stand alone in this vast universe. We are all connected to one another, and as more and more people awaken to that reality, we will see more and more manifestations in the world that shout – we are all in this together!

This video brought tears to my eyes… I seem to be becoming more and more sensitive to what it is that humans are doing to the earth – plants/animals, ecosystems/habitat, etc. This is what makes me feel like I need to be the change I want to see in the world!! It is becoming increasingly difficult for me to live on without constantly thinking about what I can do to help increase awareness and and influence change in peoples hearts. I keep thinking about what my dad said to me the other day when I was talking to him about sustainability. I mentioned how we as Americans have been conditioned to have our sole purpose be consumers which is what drives our economy and my dad said he likes being a consumer. I tried to explain that it isn’t a sustainable way to live but I don’t think he understands at all. It just goes to show that there are so many other people out there in the world with very backwards ways of thinking about reality – but I can’t even completely blame most of them because they are all still asleep and really don’t know what they are doing. I constantly question everything I do every day in relationship to living more in harmony with the earths ecosystems and I am constantly frustrated and challenged with the current models of society that seem to be such a force against living in harmony. I know that more and more people are waking up every day, yet when I think about how much damage we’ve already done, and how deeply conditioned so many people are, it seems very daunting to think that somehow there will be a big enough change in a short enough amount of time to get everyone on board with this!

When I think of abundance vs scarcity as it relates to our current economic system, I think about how money is the standard by which we class ourselves – whoever has the most of it is worth more than those that don’t, and those with the money get the goods, those that don’t, well, don’t. What follows is a perceived sense of scarcity of basic human needs which puts people in survival/fear mode, which in turn makes them easier to control. Another side-effect of the scarcity model is that it invokes the urge to hoard which conveniently fits well with Darwin’s theory of evolution – survival of the fittest. Life then becomes a race against our fellow humans to be the best at capturing as much money as possible in order to secure survival and prosperity. What I see in terms of freeing ourselves as humans from the illusion of scarcity is empowering ourselves to provide the basics for ourselves instead of relying on some ever-present, pervasive, yet unseen power that controls access to and cost of to these basics. Once we can accomplish that level of freedom, then follows the potential for greater ideas to emerge within the fabric of a truly free world.

I consider access to healthy food, clean water, and (free) energy as the bare minimum “basic” requirement for human survival and freedom. Ultimately, it all boils down to abundant/free energy when it comes to freeing/saving humanity. Technically, we don’t need energy in order to survive, but without it, technology would (mostly) not exist. If abundant and free energy was here today, we would be able to literally “green the deserts”. Therein lies the potential for technology to aid us in creating an oasis, eden, heaven on earth.

Back to currency… Well, I guess I see currency today as a means of control by those who have the most money – interest is charged to those that need money while those that have all the money get to collect more money. I think it’s an insane system that should be taken down. We really need to get back to basics, again, on what is the purpose of currency to begin with? Currency is a form of exchange for goods and services. In our current financial system, banks have taken over control of money and are selling it back to us and calling it “services”. Currency is valuable only because it represents a means for trading goods and services without having to trade goods for goods, service for service, service for goods, etc. It makes it easier for us to actually trade what we create/have to offer as humans whether it is delicious organic produce, a massage, carpentry skills, artistic design skills, healing, furniture, education, clothing, etc. These goods and services are in abundance because we as humans are the ones creating and sharing these goods and services. We don’t need a currency to do that – currency just makes the process more expedient. Currency should be created as we create – in that sense, there is no limit, and therefore it is abundant.

There is no need for scarcity in this world – we just need to open our eyes and our hearts and do the work!

In the moment of our gaze
I drop mine to the floor
You walk away –
Not knowing I want more.

There is no way
To speak unspoken words
A lifetime passed and still -
You wouldn’t know completely how I feel.

What is work
But what we’re forced to do
In order to live
A life of convenience –
Comfort , security.
We work to pay for all this stuff –
This material junk
We’re told will make us happy, yet
We never have time to enjoy
Forgetting the simple pleasures –
The joys of a life in a world
Without all this stuff.

We spend our lives working
For power-hungry thieves
Of freedom, of life, of spirit
Oppressed and pressed to conform
Trained to believe, for example,
That happiness is buying
A new car that we’ll be bored of
Before we pay it off
And so the cycle continues
Weighed down – helpless, trapped.
Lugging around this ball and chain –
The debt and all this stuff.

Will we every break free?
Can we reprogram ourselves
To believe that our work
Can be more than being enslaved
Fulfilling the master’s
Self-serving ambitions
While our own dreams are confined
In our minds, safe and secure?
I hope to God I’m not the only
One here who wants to be free.
Our futures depend on this hope.
We can’t let it happen to us.

I woke up this morning with a strange feeling that everything
That mattered to me before, was no longer a concern.

It wasn’t anything like a dream yet as the waking hours waned
The realization that what mattered to me before really did matter

Slowly crept its way into my thoughts and all lightheartedness
About the world drifted away like a balloon let loose

After a birthday party in the summertime.
And as the balloon eventually disappeared into the great blue sky,

So did all hope that one day what mattered to me
Will matter to them – the ones who always told me

Families can be together forever – and yet I now know
This applies only to those they consider to be worthy

Of the type of love they define as something separate
Than what I have found to be true.

There is no room for the love I know in their home
For theirs is a home wholly founded on a dogma that cannot be shattered

By any love that contradicts their beliefs – no matter how great
No matter how beautiful or humble or pure.

And as the hours of the day drift on into the night there is no sight
Of the balloon – for there is no summer here -

No parties to attend in happy celebration of our ties.
For the blood that bonds us is not nearly enough to inhibit

The love that would be forgotten were it not for my constant reminder
To you that I am no longer there.

The intolerance resounds
Through the center of her being
Like the crushing of a body
Pounded in to a brick wall
Swallowed in the crudeness
Of unrequited absolution
Cold and heartless favor
The wall stands tall

No sign of remorse
From tormenting invocations
Forbidding force of nature
No mercy for the soul
There is no resolution
To the absentness of virtue
Contemptuously looming
There’s nowhere left to go.

I am saddened and disturbed by the fervent support of the Mormon church of stripping rights away from people just because they don’t love the way others do.
I feel ashamed that I am one of those people that my family has voted to strip my rights away
I want to stand up for my self and have my voice be heard
I want to tell my entire family what it means to me
But words are so hard to say sometimes when they come from a place that hurts more than imaginable
I want to shun away
I can’t bear to pretend everything’s ok
They don’t even accept me for who I am
They think I’m a sinner because I love someone of the same-sex
Why is this kind of love so scary to people?
It threatens their ideology but not them personally
Embarrassed that the church I grew up in is the cause of so much of my pain and now so many others
Embarrassed that California actually passed a proposition that embeds discrimination into the Constitution
Angry that the church donated money to a campaign that promotes persecution when they themselves have been persecuted by others
Angry that they took advantage of the black community – knowing that they would be coming out in huge numbers to support a president who more closely represents them for the first time ever – a community that has been persecuted throughout history and the church supported a campaign that has spread lies about Obama supporting Prop 8 to get them to vote yes. That to me is repulsive behavior. To know that the church members tithing is going to fund these kinds of hate-spreading activities is despicable.
It bothers me that who I am is judged by others
It bothers me that 51.8% of voters in California believe that I don’t deserve equality.

Your love is like rain
Pouring down upon me
And then evaporating
Once the sun comes out
Soaked and seemingly everlasting
It vanishes once what lights up my life
Shines brighter than the clouds above
That bring the rain

The warmth I receive
From the suns rays are enough
To make me feel whole enough
To make me forget about
What the rain feels like upon my skin
And the rain only comes sometimes
And these days not as often as before

So I go on soaking up the sun
Instead of feeling cold and damp
I can’t imagine you would blame me
Even though I know you think the sun
That gives me warmth is artificial
And eventually the light will go out
And I’ll be all alone in the dark

My life is like my painting
Each stroke a declaration
That what came before it
Is not enough
Searching for perfection in the imperfectable
On a quest that has no end
I see the potential – I grasp it
Too tightly it seems, the perfect image
Slips away from me
It disappears, morphs, merges
Into the murkiness of what’s left behind
I start again building
Upon the residue of the past
Nothing can completely erase it
Not the past
Or the feeling of what was lost
In search of the perfect beauty
Not seeing what’s in front of me
Forgetting that all that exists is this moment
This perfect moment
Each stroke a reflection
Of the fullness of what is